A few times in your life a book comes along that touches your soul.
Practicing Compassion by Frank Rogers, Jr is one of those books for me. When I finished the book, I wrote to the person who had recommended the book. My message was one word, “WOW.” As a Christian and a spiritual director I continue to search for ways to become more attuned to my own internal preferences and emotions. Knowing who I am helps me be more present with my spiritual direction clients. Practicing Compassion provided me the framework and tools to take another step forward in that self-discovery.
Sometimes we might think of compassion as a sympathetic feeling. Frank Rogers offers a deep understanding of compassion as a framework for a way of living. Through heartfelt stories and practical steps, Frank Rogers leads the readers through a process of learning how to be compassionate in our everyday lives. There are exercises to learn experientially how to develop compassion.
The opening premise is that every person (and I mean every person) is caring and compassionate in the core of their being. However, because of the violent world we live in and our own experiences in life, we get off the track of treating others with compassion. Frank Rogers offers four steps to the practice of being compassionate. Thus, one of the values of the book is learning the how to of being compassionate.
Catch your breath and getting grounded is becoming centered so you can think rationally and recognize your own feelings. Once you are grounded, then you take your own pulse (PULSE is an acronym to examine and reflect what is going on in your interior.) Taking your own PULSE is followed by taking the other’s PULSE, and finally deciding what compassion action to take.
Practicing Compassion is an easy read, however, to really learn about the practice of compassion in your life, the book takes time to reflect on the information and then work through the exercises. Now, I grew up in a dysfunctional household, and this book helped me reflect on having compassion for myself. I hadn’t ever given too much thought to being compassionate to myself, and working through the exercise for having compassion for myself gave me several new insights.
I not only read the book and worked through the exercises; I tried to put some of the practices into my life (as a pastor at a church). There were a few situations that came up almost immediately upon finishing the book, and instead of reacting immediately, I tried the four step process, and ended up saying things or sending emails that looked very different than my initial response would have been. In every case, other people responded in a more positive manner than I would have expected.
I would like to tell you that after a few months I almost always look at people and situations with compassion. But there are still times when I forget to have compassion for myself and/or compassion for others. The results are always different than when I use the steps of being compassionate.
If you are looking for continued spiritual growth, I highly recommend Practicing Compassion. It has made a big difference in my life and I believe it can make a difference in your life. Practicing Compassion is a book to add to your library.